Not as Strong as I like to pretend!

This week has been a little rough. I have found myself second guessing myself and my goals. Starting a business has been a roller coaster or a ride. Many days I am excited and loving where my life is heading. Then other days I just want to burry my head in the sand and pretend the world does not exist. Most days I can get up put a smile on my face and get through the day without anyone realizing where I am mentally. Other days its apparent I suck! I will say that I have some amazing partners taking this journey with me, and when I am not able to stop myself from over doing things they are not afraid to tell me enough is enough. I appreciate this a lot but on the other hand I hate that I have showed any weakness. I spent most of my life being weak and I don’t ever want to feel that way again.

While things are hard right now with the business and no money coming in I keep reminding myself that this is part of the process and I know things will change in time. We have only been open for 2 months and at this point I feel like we are doing okay. At the end of the day the stress and the struggle with make me appreciate the business even more when it allows me to have the freedom I want.

I also need to remember that if I don’t take care of myself those nightmares that I have been dealing with lately are only going to become more intense and stay around longer. I also know I have to stop missing my therapy appointments because I do worse with out them. Today I am back to feeling empowered and ready to take things back into my own hands. I will meet my goals and I will continue to fight to take back complete power from the assholes who tried to destroy my life. I am keep reminding myself I am a SURVIVOR!!

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